Beach. Mountain. Hills.

I think...I want to go to the beach. 
































I think...I want to go to the mountains.

































I think...I want to go to the hills.

I think...I would make a nice little hermitess. I think I might like it. I think of summer. Fresh air. Blue sky. A horse. or two. Clouds. Animals. Sun. Shrubs. Grass. Heat. Snakes. Fog. Different smells. Different noises. Different habits. What would life like that actually be like? Do dreams ever come true?

I think. I wish. I dream.

What will life bring???

I am not applying myself. I am not content. I am not trusting the Lord. I have a victim mentality. Greener grass on the other side.  Prisoner with ball and chain. In a dark deep dungeon.  

Walking the rope. 

 

On the fence.

  

At the crossroads.

  How long can one stay? and not come to a decision—one or the other?

Blindfolded. My own doing. Somehow it all connects. Somehow. The key is in front of me. So close. So far away. Misted. Fogged. Clouded. Is my vision.

Never thought I would actually understand the allegory Pilgrim’s Progress personally. Sure, it’s a good story. Now. It’s ME. How LONG will it take to bow the knee?! No. I will not do it for appearances. I will not do it for a record. I will not do it to “feel” better. I WILL do it and not look back. I WILL do it by the grace of God. I WILL do it: when I understand.

Thank you, Jesus.

Love,

A Sinner, Saved by Grace alone